Where Feet May Fail
My senior year of college was lived at a whirlwind pace, so the moments of peace throughout the semesters were few and far between. However, over fall break of that year, I went on one of my favorite beach trips of all time to Destin, Florida. Not only did we stay in an incredible house and spend our nights eating half-baked chocolate chip cookies out of the pan, the group of us was able to just be with each other, for one of the last times before everything changed. That trip reminds me of living during a time when I felt on the cusp of everything: marriage, moving, new circles of friends, and letting go of the comfort I had grown to call home. That trip was one of the last times I truly felt like a kid, absent of worry. Last Sunday, the worship band played the song "Oceans" at our church, and I pictured that sunset in Seaside. Though this song is a few years old and probably overplayed, if we're being honest, the impact of the lyrics still hits home.
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders Let me walk upon the waters Wherever You would call me Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander And my faith will be made stronger In the presence of my Savior
"Trust without borders" are three words that perfectly describe the season of life that I jumped into post-grad. I moved to a city where I literally knew no one, and every good and bad thing that has happened since then has been a roller coaster of emotions. God definitely took me deeper than I ever would have dared to venture by myself, and even through the confusing times, I'm thankful for that.
The bridge of this song is famous because it makes us feel alive; it makes us feel like we can jump into the unknown with confidence because God will make everything okay. But if I'm being honest, it's difficult to see how your faith is being strengthened when you're in the thick of the challenge. I've learned that it's easy to get into a rut of hearing encouraging words and turning a blind eye because they sound too good to be true. I jumped into deeper waters, but I don't always feel like I'm swimming.
But, when the song played on Sunday, a different phrase jumped out to me:
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me You've never failed and You won't start now
If we're being honest with ourselves, we often jump, only to find that our feet have failed us (or at least we think they have). We get fired up for God or our spouse or career, and get excited to take this big leap, only to find that we are scrambling for air when we land. Doubt seeps in, and we wonder if we did the right thing. I think that it's great to be encouraged to live life to the fullest, but I think that often, we need to remind ourselves that more of life is going to be lived in the in-between than the moments of sheer bravery.
After you jump, you might find that you don't feel so good, but the truth that I needed to hear this weekend was that God has never failed, and your circumstance is no different. Even if you feel unsure of your decision or are at a crossroads, He's not going to let you go off the deep end now. My feet fail in small ways every day; I'm not always the best wife, boss, or friend. But, I can rest assured in the truth that God is never done with me as long as I'm breathing, and that is a promise for all of us. When your feet fail, remember that they don't control your steps, anyway.